Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Lets face it...we all suck at driving

The title to my very first post on this new blog sums it up in its entirety. Don't get me wrong, there are tons of sites devoted to the timeless art of bitching about how other people suck at driving. But it always comes with the pretext that the author is somehow a driving god that would make Rhys Millen crap his fireproof underwear. I'm not a driving god, In fact I probably piss 5-10 people off daily on the road. But I am an experienced asshole, I've been around the driving block and have seen some things and have done some things. My goal on this humble blog is to entertain, educate and piss you off...because we sometimes need to have someone to piss us off.


Ok..some background. I started driving at the age of 15 like most people do by taking a holy pilgrimage known as driver's education. Who was instructing this event,? A class that would influence an activity that the average american spends 300 hrs a year doing. Well it was my gym teacher...the most advanced thing he ever piloted was a Corolla. I spent the next two weeks...learning how dangerous it was to speed, how not to drink and drive and how to park into a parking spot front first. God I wish I was born in Germany or Finland. In Finland children are instructed over the course of two years before getting a license. They are taught how to respond to skids, how to induce skids and how to skid around a corner faster...I think they are all rally drivers. In Germany you pay 1200 euro to get a permit and must learn for 3 years from a pro driving instructor. But no, Mr. Corrola taught me how to take a 1.5 ton missile and operate it....badly. My experience was not unique to me or my school, some schools have no training at all.

I never really started learning how to drive properly until I became a car enthusiast. You see the best way to become a better driver is to become interested in the activity itself. What got me interested...well like most people it took a car, a special kind of car. The car was a Black 1993 Eagle Talon TSI AWD and was lucky to fall into it. I bought the car from an old lady (stories like this always start with an old person) and it was her daughter's car. The daughter gave the car to this poor old woman, and her arthritis kept her from getting into the tiny seats. I on the other hand was looking for transportation upon entering the Army, and like most kids wanted a Mustang. However this car intrigued me, in fact it was damn sexy.

1993 Eagle Talon TSI AWD 
(Picture is not of my car)

Before I knew it I was attending autocross and track events. I had taken that little 2.0 Turbo to 400hp and in the end I blew the piss out of it. But that is what got me started, and very fast cars like that actually teach you to be a better driver...or you die.

Over the course of my career in the Army I had several opportunities to go to Germany and drive their roads. But in the end, it wasn't the roads that impressed me, it was the drivers. Folks there take driving seriously. Everybody knows about the autobahn and their unlimited stretches, but not many know how the drivers don't end up flaming wrecks every five minutes. Here is how...

1. The drive and drive only....no cell phone, no texting, no ipod and in the words of one driver (das car izt not a picnic!) Many German cars even have no cup holders.

2. Lane discipline- Left most lane is for passing only, no tailgating, no passing in the right lane.

3. Competance- drivers must have good health, drive well maintained cars and they all must have confidence in their skills. No driving 15mph under the speed limit because you are driving at night and scared of it.

4. The autobahns are well constructed- very few potholes, the autobahn has few completely straight sections (to stave off fatigue) and they are monitored every mile. Fines are steep for violating the rules of the road.


Americans on the other hand feel they are entitled to drive, like it is their right or something. It is not!
Driving is a privilege  Every road you drive on is payed and maintained by the taxpayer, you have no right to the road. The main problem is that we have 50 states and each one has their own laws written by individuals who get a ride to work in a limousine every day. Americans mostly hate driving, because our country is so damn big and a great deal of it is boring and we have to drive the same route every day to get to work. So we drive cars that insulate us from the road, from other drivers and take over the basic functions of driving every year. Only 15% of us can drive a manual gearbox, and since 2009 no car is equipped without stability and traction control. As such, most have no idea of the proper way to act on the road, no idea how to drive their cars at the maximum of their capabilities and generally just don't like the driving thing period.

My mission is to change that, not to "Save the Manuals" or some massive safety campaign...no I mean to "Save the Driver" because if we are not careful we might not even be able to that by ourselves for much longer.

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